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Emily: It's time to raise our vibration.

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And this is what we are here to learn.

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This is what we're here to do.

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For me, it's not just about love and
love of self, which is so important

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because that brings in so many
other aspects of self awareness

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and self worth and being enough.

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But it's that raising our
consciousness, it's awakening that

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consciousness within ourselves.

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And as we do that, we're able to shift to
these higher levels of frequencies that we

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get to a point that we will be eventually
be able to drop those lower frequencies

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of anger and fear and pain and come
just from that higher vibration of love.

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This is what we're here to do.

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And each one of us chose to come here
for a reason at this point in time.

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And each one of us has also chosen
the lessons we are here to learn.

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And for some, they are tragic.

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Catherine: Welcome to Don't Be
Caught Dead, a podcast encouraging

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open conversations about dying
and the death of a loved one.

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I'm your host, Katherine Ashton,
founder of Critical Info.

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And I'm helping to bring your
stories of death back to life.

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Because while you may not be ready
to die, at least you can be prepared.

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Don't Be Caught Dead acknowledges
the lands of the Kulin Nations

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and recognises their connection
to land, sea and community.

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We pay our respects to their Elders,
Past, present and emerging, and extend

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that respect to all Aboriginal and
Torres Strait Islander and First

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Nation peoples around the globe.

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In today's episode, I'm talking with
Emily Kista, an integrated healer,

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author, researcher, alchemist teacher,
and lifelong student of learning.

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She also has the ability of accessing
higher knowledge and wisdom.

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I can't wait to actually
speak to you today, Emily.

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Thanks for being with us.

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And thank you for having me, Catherine.

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It's such a pleasure to be here.

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So we met about two weeks ago at
a networking function, I Have A

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Breakfast, in our Cornington area.

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Yeah.

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Was really touched with
your personal story.

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You are no stranger to loss.

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Do you mind sharing some of
that story with us, Emily?

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Oh, with

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Emily: pleasure.

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So, well, it was great meeting you and
I have to say, like talking about that

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meeting, I think you were the mate,
probably the first one that really got

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my attention because this is something
that is so dear to me and so close to

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my heart and I know it all too well.

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I understand grief, I understand
loss and I understand the trauma

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that comes from grief and loss.

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So, my story started just before I
turned 30 years old and my husband

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had actually been in a car accident.

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It was three weeks after
my third child was born.

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Anyway, he had had a scan done because
he needed to have some surgery and,

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They had found this little wump in his
stomach and they said, look, you'll need

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to look into it later, blah, blah, blah,
blah, but for now, everything's okay.

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We'll go ahead.

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We'll do the surgery.

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and what not.

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So, we'd gone and he'd had a
couple of tests done and we were

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told everything looked fine.

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It was just a benign tumor,
not to worry about it.

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All be good.

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You know, he had another
scan 12 months later.

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And, He wasn't feeling so well, and
this was just before my 30th birthday.

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This was 2002, it must have been.

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And so he went back to his doctor.

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The doctor thought, Oh yeah,
we'll just put you on some

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antacid and you'll be okay.

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So he also then told the doctor
about what had happened, you know,

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a couple of years prior to that.

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And so he said, come on, let's
send you off for some scans.

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So he went off to have his scans.

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And they came back, they
weren't good at all.

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So, on my 30th birthday, we'd gone
to see a specialist who'd basically

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told us that his prognosis was that
he had probably six months to live.

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He had a very rare form of tumor,
its abbreviation is the DSRCT.

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And they actually had to send some
samples off to Sydney because they didn't

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even know, they couldn't even diagnose
it at the time here in Melbourne.

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Yeah, he had six months to live
and it's basically palliative care.

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That part of my life, I don't
know, I think part of it, you

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know, you blank it out a bit.

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But, you know, you just, you then
got to pull yourself together

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and you've got to start fighting.

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And he was such a remarkable man.

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He was given six months,
he lived two years.

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He'd also had major surgery, which he had.

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It was called a Whipple's procedure,
where they took like two thirds

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of his stomach, part of the bowel.

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Like, they couldn't get all
the cancer, but he went through

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radiation, chemotherapy.

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He was a fighter.

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For me.

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The outcome of that was that he
became my pillar of strength.

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So even though my background is nursing,
and I was able to nurse him at home

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until he passed away, he showed me
a totally different side of life.

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And he, you know, he gave me
something that I wouldn't have found.

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If it wasn't for our situation,
the critical situation,

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unfortunately also was his death.

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But what was even sadder was two
weeks before his passing, his

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brother, his younger brother had
died of an overdose and he had been

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a drug addict probably all his life.

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And it was just the most,
it was like for his parents.

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I feel like they're both with me
right now, I've just got to tell

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you, because my room has got so cold.

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But his parents, you can't even
fathom what, you know, the parents

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still living, who have just lost
two of their children, you know, who

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have lost two children in two weeks.

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And David's could have been prevented.

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But sadly, when you go down that
line where you're dealing with

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people who are not good people,
things like this can occur.

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My husband at the time was actually
in hospital and because he was

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just so sick that I actually had to
go to the hospital, take him out.

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to take him to the funeral.

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And it was really, it was just awful.

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But then, you know, he
went back to hospital.

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The week before he passed, the doctor had
actually come up to me and he said, take

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him home, let him go home to die because
that's really what he wanted to do.

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When he actually realized that, you
know, he was dying, He said, I'd

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like to, you know, just be at home.

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But I said to the doctor, I said, you
need to go and tell him he's dying.

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Like you could clearly say he wasn't
going to get better, but in his head

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at that point, he was still not dying.

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And so the doctor actually went
in, he is Mitchell Chipman, an

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amazing, amazing oncologist.

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He went in and he said, mate, go home.

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You know, leave your days out because
there's nothing we can do for you.

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And he did, we took him home and
we set up the room so that, you

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know, we brought in a hospital bed
a couple of days before he passed.

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And so it was set up correctly, you
know, that we could go through the

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right procedures with him as well.

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And it wasn't until like two days
before he passed that he actually

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turned to me and he said, I know.

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I'm dying.

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And it was like this relief actually
for me, because I'd already set the

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funeral plans, I have done everything,
but I couldn't even talk to him about it

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because, you know, he didn't have it in.

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He said that he was going to die, but he
was fully with it, like totally compass

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all the way, even to the last breath.

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And.

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He is a brilliant man and he was, you
know, he knew every password, every code,

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everything he needed was already, it was
still, you know, all within his mind.

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So two days before he died, he
said, okay, I think I need to give

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you all the passwords to everything
that included like to our accounts.

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Because he did everything.

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I didn't do anything.

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And I remember, you know, even
at one point with my sister,

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I said to her, oh my God.

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I rang her crying because I said,
I don't even know how to do the

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banking . You know, how do you do?

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We were already doing internet
banking at that point, but I

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didn't know how to do any of it.

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She had to teach me how to do everything
anyway, that two days before, not

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only did he give me all the personal
codes, he gave me everything.

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Every single code to every account, and
I'm telling you off his head, he didn't

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have to go and look up anything to go.

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They've written down.

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He knew it all off by heart and
he gave me all the codes to work.

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He gave me all the codes to home.

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Catherine: And you know, you're so
fortunate that he was that lucid

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right up until that point that
he could share that information.

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Yeah,

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Emily: very.

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It was the hardest part was watching
this man who honestly up until

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within 48 hours of death still
thought he was going to live.

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Because that was his mindset.

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He was such a remarkable man.

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And he gave me strength like there
is no other, you know, if it wasn't

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for him, I wouldn't be where I
am today because he opened up

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the most magnificent door for me.

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And I'd like to also put into that.

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You know, I never actually spoken aloud
about it, but when he was very sick,

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there was two times I actually went
through a situational depression and.

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I remember there was one time,
like I got so bad, I actually

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lost, it was like I just lost it.

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And my mum and dad were over
at the time we were at home.

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And I remember we're sitting, eating
and I just couldn't contain it.

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I couldn't control myself.

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And I went into my bedroom
and I could not stop crying.

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And my dad, like he, I guess in
his eyes it was like, you know,

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you're going to have to stop crying.

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You know, I'm going to have
to get the doctor in to help.

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You know, I don't know if subdue
is the right word, but to help you

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because you've got to pull it together.

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You can't be like this.

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The kids were there, you know, it was
one of those situations and I just knew

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I needed to go and get some help because
yes, I got myself out of bed every day.

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But you know, I was looking after
four children under ten and Looking

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after my husband and I took on that
responsibility and I couldn't do it.

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Like, I needed that help and
I'm a very big believer that

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pharmaceuticals are there for a reason
when, you know, when it's needed.

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I probably was on them for about
six months and I took my, I weaned

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myself off them and I was okay.

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But after he died, I went back to the
doctors and I got put back on them again.

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Again, it was probably only six months
and I needed that to help me get through

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the hardest days of my life because it
was like, here I am a single mother of

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32 with four children under 10 trying
to work out who's going to want me.

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That was what I thought about and how am
I going to get these kids, you know, how

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am I going to bring them up on my own?

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Catherine: And especially at that time.

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When you think that it was only two days
before his death that you were given that

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information that allowed you to function
after he died in a logistical, practical,

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every day, how do I get money out?

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What bills do I need to pay?

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Those sort of things.

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Emily: Yeah.

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Oh, absolutely.

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My whole world changed my whole
world, but in more than one way.

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I was, you know, my beautiful mum, she
was there, she would come and stay a

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couple of nights, you know, my sisters
were amazing, even, you know, I, I

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could never get over my in laws and
how amazing they were at the time, but

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they were very old school too, so, they
never dealt with the situation as a

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couple, they never, I, I, I honestly,
to how they really got through, it.

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Even today, I just go, you know, the pain
that must, well, my mother in law sadly

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passed away as well, but, you know, the
pain that they would have endured having

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lost those two children in two weeks,
first an overdose, And then one to cancer,

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I couldn't fathom, I couldn't, you know,
you and I couldn't fathom what would that

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mean to lose your children, you know,
and I guess there is that, you know, I,

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I know, I'm very aware that there's that
for me, that the whole fear of losing

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a child before your time, that's Yeah.

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So I don't usually go there,
but I'm aware of that thought.

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I know where it comes from.

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And you know, I just have to go, you know,
we're here to live our best moments and do

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it in the moment, in the present moment.

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And then, yeah.

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So then three years later, my mum
sadly passed away at breast cancer.

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And I have to say that
was probably harder.

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than losing my husband.

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And I say that because for me,
you know, my mum was my rock.

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My mum was my everything.

227
00:14:23,015 --> 00:14:24,165
She was my owl.

228
00:14:24,334 --> 00:14:29,755
And, you know, I have created a
deck of cards and the actual, you

229
00:14:29,755 --> 00:14:34,165
know, the representation is my
mum, because she, oh wow, that's so

230
00:14:34,165 --> 00:14:34,915
Catherine: beautiful.

231
00:14:35,045 --> 00:14:36,575
Emily: She is my owl of wisdom.

232
00:14:36,825 --> 00:14:42,260
And, you know, Our mother, they give
birth to us and I've been so blessed

233
00:14:42,260 --> 00:14:48,720
in my life to have, you know, the most
beautiful parents and my dad, he's

234
00:14:48,720 --> 00:14:54,169
still with us, thankfully, but, you
know, I'm so grateful to my parents

235
00:14:54,179 --> 00:14:56,439
for the upbringing we've had because.

236
00:14:56,950 --> 00:15:00,960
Regardless of what you still
experience growing up and you know,

237
00:15:00,960 --> 00:15:05,420
the lessons we're here to learn and
our own things that we go through.

238
00:15:05,459 --> 00:15:10,930
I had such an amazing upbringing,
like I can honestly tell you.

239
00:15:11,609 --> 00:15:15,579
So losing my mum, who was my everything,
you know, you speak to them every

240
00:15:15,579 --> 00:15:17,989
day on the phone, even though you
see your husband every day, you've

241
00:15:17,989 --> 00:15:19,800
had children, you know, whatever.

242
00:15:20,129 --> 00:15:23,399
It's not the Well, it wasn't for me.

243
00:15:23,399 --> 00:15:26,189
And that was probably the hardest.

244
00:15:27,140 --> 00:15:32,740
The hardest thing really going through
was that, and, you know, when I think, you

245
00:15:32,740 --> 00:15:35,860
know, here I am telling you how my husband
never thought he was going to die, well,

246
00:15:35,890 --> 00:15:38,110
my mum never saw that either, really.

247
00:15:38,579 --> 00:15:43,739
And it was hard with her because
she heard when she was first

248
00:15:43,739 --> 00:15:49,839
diagnosed, they pretty much said
you have a 10 percent chance of it.

249
00:15:50,129 --> 00:15:51,269
ever coming back.

250
00:15:52,089 --> 00:15:52,999
We got it.

251
00:15:52,999 --> 00:15:56,209
Then she, she did her chemo radiation.

252
00:15:56,219 --> 00:15:57,339
She did it all.

253
00:15:57,670 --> 00:16:01,559
She had the lumpectomy
and went into remission.

254
00:16:01,890 --> 00:16:05,280
And it wasn't really that
long after that, you know, she

255
00:16:05,280 --> 00:16:07,159
started feeling unwell again.

256
00:16:07,640 --> 00:16:11,249
And it was like, what the hell,
you know, going back and having

257
00:16:11,290 --> 00:16:13,989
to relive this all over again.

258
00:16:14,719 --> 00:16:20,200
And you just think, you know, why,
I mean, you know, things in life.

259
00:16:20,690 --> 00:16:25,370
Happened for us, not to us, and I'm a
very big believer in that, you know,

260
00:16:25,500 --> 00:16:32,339
saying that even though that individual
is experiencing that illness, it's also

261
00:16:32,339 --> 00:16:37,870
there for the loved ones around them, or
maybe for a friend that is there because

262
00:16:37,870 --> 00:16:40,560
there's an aspect of that illness.

263
00:16:40,770 --> 00:16:44,060
There's an aspect of the whole situation.

264
00:16:44,564 --> 00:16:47,125
That there's something for
you to learn from that.

265
00:16:47,594 --> 00:16:52,354
And, you know, there is plenty for
me, I guess, when I look back at

266
00:16:52,354 --> 00:16:54,464
her, but it was the hardest thing.

267
00:16:55,104 --> 00:16:58,314
She never responded well to
pharmaceutical medicine either.

268
00:16:58,655 --> 00:17:00,494
It actually sent her loopy.

269
00:17:00,494 --> 00:17:02,785
Like, I'm talking.

270
00:17:03,390 --> 00:17:06,740
Loopy to the point where there
was a couple of times I had

271
00:17:06,740 --> 00:17:09,290
to call like the cat team.

272
00:17:09,480 --> 00:17:13,679
That's em Yeah, yeah, and it's like
I can't believe I'm doing this to my

273
00:17:13,690 --> 00:17:18,729
mother But the medication she was on
was no good for her and it was just the

274
00:17:18,760 --> 00:17:24,964
saddest thing to watch But again, you
know my mum Didn't always see that she

275
00:17:24,964 --> 00:17:31,085
was dying and it wasn't until she was in
hospital and like, she never came out.

276
00:17:31,205 --> 00:17:33,865
But I remember she was
sitting on the toilet.

277
00:17:33,865 --> 00:17:38,174
I can't remember the reasoning quite why
behind it, but she says she actually said

278
00:17:38,174 --> 00:17:41,715
to me the first, it was the first time
for me for whatever she might've said to

279
00:17:41,745 --> 00:17:44,015
my dad or my sisters, maybe different.

280
00:17:44,015 --> 00:17:45,925
But she said, I'm dying, aren't I?

281
00:17:45,985 --> 00:17:47,605
And it's like, yes.

282
00:17:48,055 --> 00:17:48,705
You are.

283
00:17:49,075 --> 00:17:49,365
Catherine: How

284
00:17:49,365 --> 00:17:51,505
Emily: hard was it for you to say that?

285
00:17:51,955 --> 00:17:52,365
Very.

286
00:17:52,365 --> 00:17:56,995
Like it makes me well up, but you
know, well, just thinking back about

287
00:17:56,995 --> 00:17:59,015
it, you know, the innocence of it all.

288
00:17:59,015 --> 00:18:00,014
It was funny.

289
00:18:00,015 --> 00:18:01,775
I was telling my kids I
was doing this interview.

290
00:18:01,824 --> 00:18:03,155
My son's like, are you going to cry?

291
00:18:03,435 --> 00:18:07,905
Like, nah, you know, it's
still, still hints you.

292
00:18:08,315 --> 00:18:09,264
Yeah, it does.

293
00:18:09,455 --> 00:18:13,485
My gifts were unlocked when
my husband passed away.

294
00:18:14,280 --> 00:18:18,260
The gifts that I work on and
still working on and will work

295
00:18:18,260 --> 00:18:20,850
on until my passing to come.

296
00:18:21,540 --> 00:18:21,769
Catherine: Yeah.

297
00:18:21,769 --> 00:18:24,260
You mentioned that, that a door opened.

298
00:18:25,060 --> 00:18:26,470
Can you talk us about what happened?

299
00:18:26,659 --> 00:18:27,070
When my

300
00:18:27,070 --> 00:18:33,669
Emily: husband passed away, my very
first realization that something was

301
00:18:33,670 --> 00:18:39,090
different that I hadn't felt before was
we were sitting outside on my balcony.

302
00:18:39,325 --> 00:18:43,875
And where we lived was the biggest
deck in us, I've ever seen anyone own,

303
00:18:44,335 --> 00:18:49,625
you know, to this time, and it was
all under cover, so rain couldn't get

304
00:18:49,625 --> 00:18:55,355
in, let's put it that way, and I was
sitting on the deck, and I just went.

305
00:18:55,895 --> 00:18:57,855
Oh my god, is it raining?

306
00:18:58,105 --> 00:18:59,225
Like, what is going on?

307
00:18:59,225 --> 00:19:03,395
I could feel, like, what felt
like drops of water on my face.

308
00:19:04,294 --> 00:19:07,064
And I'm going, it's not
raining, what am I feeling?

309
00:19:07,745 --> 00:19:12,255
Anyway, over the course of the next
few weeks, what started happening was

310
00:19:12,285 --> 00:19:19,020
I wasn't experiencing a sensation that
was that sixth sense, that You know,

311
00:19:19,040 --> 00:19:25,390
that's, it was experiencing spirit and
I'm sure the whole time it was my husband.

312
00:19:25,920 --> 00:19:27,080
So I'd be in the kitchen.

313
00:19:27,080 --> 00:19:30,329
I remember three weeks later and
I'm walking and all of a sudden

314
00:19:30,330 --> 00:19:34,939
I felt like I was walking through
spiderwebs and I remember going,

315
00:19:34,939 --> 00:19:36,830
Oh my God, what's going on?

316
00:19:37,559 --> 00:19:41,760
This is like, it was starting to scare
me because then what started happening

317
00:19:41,760 --> 00:19:46,675
was I'd be lying in bed and at that
point I had a television in my room

318
00:19:46,905 --> 00:19:51,904
and I was setting it to go off like 30
minutes sort of after I knew I would

319
00:19:51,904 --> 00:19:58,344
probably go to sleep because it felt
like there was someone in my room and

320
00:19:58,344 --> 00:20:02,864
it felt like someone was tugging at
my blanket all the time, my doona,

321
00:20:03,655 --> 00:20:09,594
and I, you know, was shitting myself
to be honest going, didn't like that.

322
00:20:09,604 --> 00:20:11,895
And so I started sleeping
with my light on and.

323
00:20:12,730 --> 00:20:18,419
I was like, Oh my God, during this
period of time as well, I found

324
00:20:18,419 --> 00:20:20,799
myself being drawn to crystals.

325
00:20:20,809 --> 00:20:24,409
So just also my background is nursing.

326
00:20:24,780 --> 00:20:31,059
So I already had that aspect
of the nurturer and the healer.

327
00:20:31,840 --> 00:20:35,120
on that level of that Western medicine.

328
00:20:35,660 --> 00:20:37,730
So I found myself being drawn to crystals.

329
00:20:37,740 --> 00:20:41,850
So I'd be walking past a shop,
for example, that would have like

330
00:20:41,930 --> 00:20:45,509
jewelry with crystals inlaid in it.

331
00:20:45,510 --> 00:20:50,949
Or I walked through a past a crystal shop
and it was like, I'm not kidding you.

332
00:20:51,020 --> 00:20:55,580
It was like all of a sudden someone
would stop me in my tracks and

333
00:20:55,620 --> 00:20:58,160
like turn my head to the side.

334
00:20:58,830 --> 00:21:01,004
And I'm like, What's going on?

335
00:21:01,054 --> 00:21:02,975
And like pushing me into the door.

336
00:21:03,935 --> 00:21:06,754
And so I had to go in to
look at these products.

337
00:21:07,409 --> 00:21:10,370
And then I started finding
myself buying these products.

338
00:21:11,230 --> 00:21:18,009
And so I started finding myself going
more to crystal shops because that's

339
00:21:18,009 --> 00:21:19,699
what I seem to be really drawn to.

340
00:21:19,830 --> 00:21:23,439
And I found myself, you know,
looking around and when there was

341
00:21:23,439 --> 00:21:26,129
something I was meant to buy, it
was like, someone would stop me.

342
00:21:27,264 --> 00:21:30,885
Turn me, and I mean, it felt
like I was physically being

343
00:21:30,935 --> 00:21:33,534
turned to go on with the crystal.

344
00:21:34,054 --> 00:21:39,784
So, of course, over the course of
2004, here I am buying crystals.

345
00:21:39,784 --> 00:21:41,365
I had no idea what to do with them.

346
00:21:41,994 --> 00:21:47,830
But what was happening was, as I was
buying these crystals, I would like put

347
00:21:47,830 --> 00:21:51,930
them on a part of my body, not knowing
what I was doing, but I also felt

348
00:21:51,930 --> 00:21:54,640
sick doing it because I had no idea.

349
00:21:54,640 --> 00:22:00,449
And because it's understanding that
everything is energy and crystals

350
00:22:00,450 --> 00:22:06,364
are energy and every crystal also
has its own specific energetic state.

351
00:22:06,565 --> 00:22:11,745
Signature and certain crystals are going
to have a higher frequency than others.

352
00:22:11,755 --> 00:22:15,384
So when you start working with these
higher frequencies and your body isn't

353
00:22:15,435 --> 00:22:20,554
at that level, it's, you know, you're,
you're actually bringing it into

354
00:22:20,555 --> 00:22:26,055
your energetic field and it starts to
shift your vibration, your frequency.

355
00:22:26,485 --> 00:22:30,155
So when you're not used to it, it can
actually make you feel quite nauseous.

356
00:22:30,709 --> 00:22:34,090
And as something you've got to
work towards, you know, you do

357
00:22:34,090 --> 00:22:36,050
it slowly, but I had no idea what

358
00:22:36,050 --> 00:22:36,719
Catherine: I was doing.

359
00:22:36,889 --> 00:22:41,719
And Emily, so is that based on the
principle that we're all matters

360
00:22:41,909 --> 00:22:44,850
with energy around us and you need

361
00:22:44,850 --> 00:22:45,270
Emily: energy?

362
00:22:45,695 --> 00:22:51,205
Yep, everything is matter and matter
is energy, energy is conscious,

363
00:22:51,235 --> 00:22:52,774
you know, matter is consciousness.

364
00:22:52,784 --> 00:22:57,264
So when we think about it in that way,
it's matter that created form and,

365
00:22:57,445 --> 00:23:02,115
you know, so everything is energy,
even to the chairs that we're sitting

366
00:23:02,115 --> 00:23:04,514
on the tables that's in front of us.

367
00:23:04,724 --> 00:23:05,734
It's just that.

368
00:23:05,865 --> 00:23:08,875
We are at such a different vibration.

369
00:23:08,925 --> 00:23:11,514
What we're looking at is
something that is solid.

370
00:23:11,885 --> 00:23:17,324
But if you were to match the frequency,
say, of the table, you could probably

371
00:23:17,324 --> 00:23:22,054
find that you would be able to put your
hand through that table, so to speak.

372
00:23:22,054 --> 00:23:26,335
So, Yeah, coming back to that,
I thought, okay, I need to start

373
00:23:26,335 --> 00:23:29,685
doing a course, or I need to start
looking into what it is I need to do.

374
00:23:30,855 --> 00:23:36,635
And so the very first thing I did
is I found this lady and she did

375
00:23:36,665 --> 00:23:41,695
this course on crystals and how
to work with crystals in healing.

376
00:23:41,695 --> 00:23:45,965
And of course, I sort of jumped the
gun, you know, the other women that were

377
00:23:45,965 --> 00:23:49,875
in the class at the time already had.

378
00:23:50,455 --> 00:23:55,045
Done some form of Reiki or energy
healing where I'd done nothing.

379
00:23:55,075 --> 00:23:57,295
I had no idea what I was doing.

380
00:23:57,785 --> 00:24:02,484
So after I'd done her course that
my neighbor at the time, she said,

381
00:24:02,485 --> 00:24:04,165
Oh, why don't you come and do Reiki?

382
00:24:04,195 --> 00:24:05,265
Let's do Reiki together.

383
00:24:05,355 --> 00:24:07,855
I'm like, Oh, I didn't really
want to, but I thought, yep.

384
00:24:08,004 --> 00:24:08,365
All right.

385
00:24:08,444 --> 00:24:08,924
Okay.

386
00:24:09,315 --> 00:24:11,185
So that's how my journey started.

387
00:24:11,195 --> 00:24:12,245
It was really.

388
00:24:12,495 --> 00:24:18,054
Going to things that I was interested
in being shown and, you know, from

389
00:24:18,054 --> 00:24:22,775
there, going from one thing to another,
to another, and over the course of the

390
00:24:22,785 --> 00:24:25,024
years, I've done a number of courses.

391
00:24:25,024 --> 00:24:31,895
I've also taught some of my own courses,
but what eventuated from that was

392
00:24:32,024 --> 00:24:36,475
crystals were the very first thing I
used to sell crystals as well as a very

393
00:24:36,475 --> 00:24:40,815
big crystal seller before I did anything
else, you know, as the time went on.

394
00:24:41,305 --> 00:24:47,195
And what I then started doing was I
would get a crystal and I would put

395
00:24:47,195 --> 00:24:54,025
it in water and I started having this
idea that I could make these essences.

396
00:24:54,835 --> 00:24:58,995
No idea what I was doing, but
I thought I'd start playing.

397
00:24:59,335 --> 00:25:02,315
And this was all before 2010, mind you.

398
00:25:02,794 --> 00:25:08,419
And I decided, you know, I
really need to go and learn.

399
00:25:08,560 --> 00:25:09,740
There's something I'm doing.

400
00:25:09,740 --> 00:25:13,129
I'm not quite sure what, but
it feels right, but I don't

401
00:25:13,139 --> 00:25:14,760
know if I'm doing it correctly.

402
00:25:15,000 --> 00:25:19,740
And I ended up finding a lady who
I spent many years learning under

403
00:25:20,119 --> 00:25:25,820
and she was my teacher, you know,
for a long, long time and wonderful.

404
00:25:25,850 --> 00:25:30,150
But what was so amazing is that it,
what it taught me was that everything

405
00:25:30,150 --> 00:25:32,000
that I was doing was actually.

406
00:25:32,295 --> 00:25:32,945
Correct.

407
00:25:33,255 --> 00:25:37,185
Plus, she showed, you know, there are
other things that I was learning to wise.

408
00:25:37,195 --> 00:25:42,054
It was the whys and the hows of it
all, which was absolutely beautiful.

409
00:25:42,645 --> 00:25:48,384
And with all of this that I was doing,
understand that it was also helping

410
00:25:48,565 --> 00:25:52,294
me work with my grief and my sorrow.

411
00:25:52,960 --> 00:25:59,820
My loss, my trauma, and you know,
we're always working on shifting

412
00:25:59,820 --> 00:26:01,750
elements and aspects of ourselves.

413
00:26:01,750 --> 00:26:04,250
You know, we're learning to let go.

414
00:26:04,260 --> 00:26:08,120
We're learning, you know, that
old energy we need to release

415
00:26:08,130 --> 00:26:10,020
so that we can let that new in.

416
00:26:10,410 --> 00:26:12,769
So we're always working on self.

417
00:26:12,979 --> 00:26:18,120
As far as I'm concerned, it's lifelong,
you know, it's learning that element,

418
00:26:18,390 --> 00:26:20,530
that aspect specifically to learn to love.

419
00:26:21,580 --> 00:26:22,540
To be loved.

420
00:26:22,880 --> 00:26:25,760
And then it's also about
raising consciousness.

421
00:26:25,760 --> 00:26:30,570
It's about creating the awareness,
that awakening aspect of who we are.

422
00:26:30,960 --> 00:26:34,629
And for me, these are two of the
greatest things that, you know, to

423
00:26:34,629 --> 00:26:36,690
me is what we're here to truly learn.

424
00:26:36,960 --> 00:26:39,310
Catherine: And so just
recapping on that, Emily.

425
00:26:40,110 --> 00:26:41,870
So it's.

426
00:26:42,675 --> 00:26:45,735
our energy and where we
stick with our energy.

427
00:26:46,265 --> 00:26:50,735
And then the other thing is consciousness.

428
00:26:51,224 --> 00:26:51,554
Yeah.

429
00:26:51,605 --> 00:26:53,444
Would that be the two things
that you're focusing on?

430
00:26:53,975 --> 00:26:58,234
Emily: So in terms of what I'm saying
is that I think there are two main

431
00:26:58,234 --> 00:27:02,465
things that we need to learn in this
lifetime, that is to love and to be loved.

432
00:27:03,360 --> 00:27:08,810
And accept love, and to create
an awareness consciousness.

433
00:27:09,170 --> 00:27:11,090
So it's an open heart, open mind.

434
00:27:11,670 --> 00:27:15,810
These are the two aspects that I
believe we are truly here to learn.

435
00:27:16,150 --> 00:27:21,810
And then there's everything on the outer
or in between of that, that comes with it.

436
00:27:22,300 --> 00:27:25,480
These are what I believe
we are here to do.

437
00:27:25,520 --> 00:27:29,840
My teachings, my learning, my research.

438
00:27:30,574 --> 00:27:34,465
And a lot of this has come through
the work that I've channeled.

439
00:27:34,895 --> 00:27:38,235
So, you know, it's learning
everything is energy.

440
00:27:38,235 --> 00:27:43,585
So everything that I do now is all
based around energy, frequency, and

441
00:27:43,585 --> 00:27:46,905
vibration, because everything is energy.

442
00:27:47,655 --> 00:27:50,088
Catherine: And this isn't
a new concept, is it?

443
00:27:50,088 --> 00:27:51,104
No, not at all.

444
00:27:51,105 --> 00:27:55,584
I've heard a story whereby there's
a particular religion that bring

445
00:27:55,935 --> 00:27:59,635
the people who are specialists
out to Australia to work out.

446
00:28:00,360 --> 00:28:06,360
where the energy fields are as the
Bedouins were actually put their temple.

447
00:28:06,780 --> 00:28:08,519
Emily: Yeah, yeah, absolutely.

448
00:28:08,519 --> 00:28:10,350
And that's all to do with Geomancy.

449
00:28:10,390 --> 00:28:11,580
Yeah, absolutely.

450
00:28:11,599 --> 00:28:15,749
You look at Egypt, you know,
you look at every sacred site

451
00:28:15,750 --> 00:28:20,210
around the world, they're all
built on ley lines and vortexes.

452
00:28:20,514 --> 00:28:24,975
And the ancients knew exactly where to
build because it was where the highest

453
00:28:24,985 --> 00:28:27,495
levels of energy were going to come from.

454
00:28:27,765 --> 00:28:32,484
And for them to utilize within their
temples, within their structures, look

455
00:28:32,564 --> 00:28:34,335
at all the pyramids around the world.

456
00:28:34,795 --> 00:28:40,285
They're not just placed anywhere, they're
placed in very specific locations.

457
00:28:41,105 --> 00:28:42,865
everywhere around the world.

458
00:28:43,345 --> 00:28:47,725
They knew exactly what they were doing
and people are doing that now as well.

459
00:28:47,905 --> 00:28:53,455
Catherine: Yeah, I attended Stonehenge
last year when I was in the UK and there

460
00:28:53,455 --> 00:28:56,235
is no mistake in any of that layout.

461
00:28:56,594 --> 00:28:57,474
Emily: No mistake.

462
00:28:57,594 --> 00:28:57,994
Yeah.

463
00:28:58,334 --> 00:28:59,614
I hope to go next year.

464
00:28:59,664 --> 00:29:01,374
That's my big thing.

465
00:29:01,455 --> 00:29:03,985
And what you've got to also
understand, just as we're talking

466
00:29:03,995 --> 00:29:09,595
about the sacred sites, is that when
you're in these places, you have

467
00:29:09,595 --> 00:29:14,249
to understand that Whether you're
aware of it or not, you will receive

468
00:29:14,260 --> 00:29:16,810
some form of activation being there.

469
00:29:17,310 --> 00:29:24,740
Because you're within a certain frequency
that is of a very high frequency.

470
00:29:25,010 --> 00:29:29,920
And it's Your body is absorbing
that energetic field because your

471
00:29:29,940 --> 00:29:32,890
body is within that perimeter.

472
00:29:33,580 --> 00:29:39,740
So, this is one of the reasons too
why I take people or, you know, for

473
00:29:39,750 --> 00:29:43,969
me going to these sacred places,
taking people to these sacred places,

474
00:29:44,269 --> 00:29:48,680
is because I know that you will
receive some form of activation,

475
00:29:48,940 --> 00:29:50,920
whether you're aware of it or not.

476
00:29:51,360 --> 00:29:53,840
You will go through some form of shift.

477
00:29:53,840 --> 00:29:57,110
Like if you think about
what you did last year.

478
00:29:57,770 --> 00:30:03,130
If you were just to go back to that
time of, you know, coming back from

479
00:30:03,410 --> 00:30:07,120
Stonehenge and maybe some of the
other sacred sites within the area,

480
00:30:07,170 --> 00:30:08,339
cause you would have done them.

481
00:30:08,440 --> 00:30:13,100
Can you say you came back, like even
before you left, were there any,

482
00:30:13,260 --> 00:30:18,030
you know, slight shifts that you
felt or when you came home, is there

483
00:30:18,030 --> 00:30:23,510
something that impacted you enough
that to go, I need to change something?

484
00:30:23,910 --> 00:30:27,750
Something doesn't sit right within
my life and you're not maybe

485
00:30:27,760 --> 00:30:29,310
even realizing the reason why.

486
00:30:29,770 --> 00:30:30,160
Yeah.

487
00:30:30,160 --> 00:30:34,520
Catherine: For us personally, it was
quite a shift that we experienced.

488
00:30:34,929 --> 00:30:38,250
I think we'd lost our friend
earlier in the year in February.

489
00:30:38,820 --> 00:30:40,749
We traveled to the UK.

490
00:30:41,180 --> 00:30:41,509
We were.

491
00:30:42,165 --> 00:30:43,725
seeing relatives over there.

492
00:30:44,405 --> 00:30:47,475
So we went around quite
a few significant sites.

493
00:30:47,815 --> 00:30:52,464
And then we also traveled to Italy to
settle our son, who was living over there.

494
00:30:53,145 --> 00:30:55,185
So it was a quite an emotional time.

495
00:30:55,935 --> 00:31:01,195
But what was quite healing, I think,
is that just that process of actually

496
00:31:01,195 --> 00:31:05,634
going to a Northern Hemisphere, when
we're in a Southern Hemisphere and

497
00:31:05,634 --> 00:31:13,020
experiencing that time shift that we
went through in just, I suppose, energy.

498
00:31:13,090 --> 00:31:16,760
I think that that helped
with resetting how we felt.

499
00:31:17,000 --> 00:31:17,350
Yeah.

500
00:31:18,100 --> 00:31:22,710
Emily: And it's, you know, it may
be any small or subtle things.

501
00:31:23,805 --> 00:31:27,225
But when you, you know, even me
saying this to you now, you know,

502
00:31:27,225 --> 00:31:31,664
even after this podcast, you might
get off and you go, Hmm, you know, let

503
00:31:31,745 --> 00:31:33,585
me think a little bit more into it.

504
00:31:33,595 --> 00:31:40,005
You know, maybe when you were there, it
was your reason to start these podcasts

505
00:31:40,005 --> 00:31:44,255
or to start the business that you did,
or I don't know if that was already out.

506
00:31:44,755 --> 00:31:45,965
By then, sorry, so.

507
00:31:46,135 --> 00:31:47,985
Catherine: No, no, I
hadn't started recording

508
00:31:47,985 --> 00:31:48,695
Emily: at that stage.

509
00:31:48,785 --> 00:31:49,265
Right.

510
00:31:49,535 --> 00:31:53,495
You know, so with the ideas that
you can get, you know, having been

511
00:31:53,495 --> 00:31:58,314
there or go, okay, I need a little
bit of a life change, lifestyle shift

512
00:31:58,314 --> 00:32:01,244
or look, it's for so many reasons.

513
00:32:01,265 --> 00:32:06,784
And my journey with this kind of,
you know, for me, personal journeys

514
00:32:06,955 --> 00:32:11,755
to these sacred sites started back
in 2010 when I went to Sedona.

515
00:32:12,144 --> 00:32:12,444
So.

516
00:32:13,075 --> 00:32:16,555
I actually used sacred sites.

517
00:32:16,880 --> 00:32:24,550
To go and heal aspects of myself that I
was still dealing with because I knew I

518
00:32:24,550 --> 00:32:29,989
needed that release, but my higher self
knew that this is where I needed to go.

519
00:32:30,449 --> 00:32:35,499
And yes, I was fortunate enough to be able
to afford to go to these places as well.

520
00:32:35,939 --> 00:32:36,279
So.

521
00:32:37,945 --> 00:32:43,515
And not everyone can afford to travel
overseas to go to these places, but even

522
00:32:43,515 --> 00:32:47,964
if you do the research, you will find
there are sacred sites, even where around

523
00:32:47,964 --> 00:32:52,514
where you live, you know, it might even
be, you can go up to Queensland and go

524
00:32:52,995 --> 00:32:58,385
to some of the mountain areas around
there, or you might go to certain sacred

525
00:32:58,385 --> 00:33:05,210
rivers or water holes where, you know,
You can go and have that time to have

526
00:33:05,210 --> 00:33:11,150
your own little sacred ceremony, if
you will, and you know, to go through,

527
00:33:11,370 --> 00:33:15,570
this is what I'm here for, I need, you
know, I'm looking to create release, I'm

528
00:33:15,580 --> 00:33:17,940
looking to soothe and heal the heart.

529
00:33:18,805 --> 00:33:21,585
You know, cause this is what we
go through when we go through

530
00:33:21,585 --> 00:33:23,195
loss and grief and trauma.

531
00:33:23,505 --> 00:33:24,855
We need to heal the heart.

532
00:33:24,855 --> 00:33:31,805
We need to soothe the soul, the sacral,
you know, the wounding that comes from

533
00:33:31,935 --> 00:33:38,315
all of the lost, you know, as you said
earlier, trauma is held within the body.

534
00:33:39,195 --> 00:33:41,205
And our body is our temple.

535
00:33:41,205 --> 00:33:46,515
Our body is here to express itself
from say, Hey, are you listening?

536
00:33:46,805 --> 00:33:50,184
And if it's not coming through your
body, it's coming through your car.

537
00:33:50,495 --> 00:33:53,815
Because, you know, when we discussed
earlier, there is a book called the

538
00:33:53,815 --> 00:33:55,625
bodies of the barometer of the soul.

539
00:33:55,934 --> 00:33:57,784
And in that book, you could also.

540
00:33:58,310 --> 00:33:59,100
Have a look.

541
00:33:59,110 --> 00:34:00,820
And it talks about your car.

542
00:34:01,220 --> 00:34:03,240
You go, I've got this issue with it.

543
00:34:03,240 --> 00:34:04,080
Let me look it up.

544
00:34:04,150 --> 00:34:05,290
Catherine: What's it telling me?

545
00:34:05,580 --> 00:34:05,950
You know?

546
00:34:06,580 --> 00:34:10,360
And that's when I was mentioning,
I should say, Bessel Vandelkoch's

547
00:34:10,360 --> 00:34:12,609
book about the body keeps the score.

548
00:34:12,890 --> 00:34:13,870
Absolutely.

549
00:34:14,140 --> 00:34:18,800
While you were talking there, Emily, I
thought of the fact that both my husband

550
00:34:18,800 --> 00:34:23,580
and I, when we were in the UK last year,
we both had that experience of traveling

551
00:34:23,620 --> 00:34:25,460
in the footsteps of our ancestors.

552
00:34:26,005 --> 00:34:26,495
Yeah.

553
00:34:26,905 --> 00:34:29,995
And that was really super
powerful for both of us.

554
00:34:30,635 --> 00:34:31,055
Yeah.

555
00:34:31,795 --> 00:34:32,515
I think so.

556
00:34:33,125 --> 00:34:36,845
And is that something that you also
discuss in the work that you do?

557
00:34:37,074 --> 00:34:41,965
That ability to connect with, I
suppose, that energy from ancestors

558
00:34:41,965 --> 00:34:44,435
past and, you know, Those sort of areas?

559
00:34:44,555 --> 00:34:46,065
Emily: Yeah, absolutely.

560
00:34:46,265 --> 00:34:50,595
Because, you know, when we look
at the antithesis, and we look at

561
00:34:50,775 --> 00:34:54,605
ancient civilizations, you know,
going back that far, because it's

562
00:34:54,605 --> 00:34:56,535
understanding we are all connected.

563
00:34:57,125 --> 00:34:58,785
We are all part of the one.

564
00:34:59,424 --> 00:35:04,460
And You know, when we can look back
and we can see like I'm going back

565
00:35:04,460 --> 00:35:08,350
on a larger scale, but you know When
we look at ancient civilizations, we

566
00:35:08,350 --> 00:35:11,479
look at how highly advanced they were.

567
00:35:11,779 --> 00:35:15,160
You look at that point
That's pre Deleuvian.

568
00:35:15,170 --> 00:35:21,670
So that point sort of passed 12, 000
years ago then we had the big cataclysm

569
00:35:21,680 --> 00:35:27,125
that occurred and it was like We came,
you know, for those that survived and

570
00:35:27,125 --> 00:35:33,365
then for those that came after, it was
more like we've come back with amnesia.

571
00:35:33,675 --> 00:35:36,105
It's their non ability to remember.

572
00:35:36,825 --> 00:35:42,845
And, you know, so you have to start
questioning how What did thing,

573
00:35:43,105 --> 00:35:44,985
you know, what did survive survive?

574
00:35:44,985 --> 00:35:46,035
How were they built?

575
00:35:46,555 --> 00:35:47,715
How were they created?

576
00:35:47,725 --> 00:35:49,835
Where did the technology come from?

577
00:35:50,295 --> 00:35:56,034
I think what's very important to
understand is that everything that

578
00:35:56,035 --> 00:36:02,164
has occurred within this universe
is held within our cellular matrix.

579
00:36:03,000 --> 00:36:07,030
All the answers we're ever
needing are already within us.

580
00:36:07,440 --> 00:36:12,460
So, so many of the times we're looking
externally to find answers, but the

581
00:36:12,460 --> 00:36:17,180
answers that we truly seek are already
within you, and you'll find them.

582
00:36:17,810 --> 00:36:23,415
And what I love is that when we do go
back to these places, That we, you know,

583
00:36:23,415 --> 00:36:27,845
do you, did you go back when you're
tracing these lines or, you know, going

584
00:36:27,865 --> 00:36:33,474
back in the footsteps of your ancestors,
were there times where you actually felt

585
00:36:33,474 --> 00:36:37,435
such an alignment or just this inner
knowing that, you know, your hair's

586
00:36:37,445 --> 00:36:42,415
stand on end and you go, Oh my God,
I'm having this aha moment, or you just

587
00:36:42,415 --> 00:36:47,655
know something, or you, you know, it
might even be in some aspect of deja vu.

588
00:36:48,194 --> 00:36:49,654
And you go, I know it.

589
00:36:50,235 --> 00:36:50,915
I feel it.

590
00:36:51,045 --> 00:36:51,715
I've seen it.

591
00:36:52,015 --> 00:36:53,145
There's something here.

592
00:36:53,525 --> 00:36:58,885
Catherine: I've certainly had experiences
of deja vu on regular occasions, actually.

593
00:36:59,945 --> 00:37:06,435
I did experience that when I was
reconnecting with my grandmother's house

594
00:37:06,564 --> 00:37:12,015
and where she was born and where my great
aunt was born, but I did have an immense

595
00:37:12,095 --> 00:37:18,885
sense of pride and connection and to feel
that they walked in these same steps.

596
00:37:19,400 --> 00:37:22,620
They pruned these trees
that are still existing.

597
00:37:22,990 --> 00:37:25,150
So that was pretty amazing for me.

598
00:37:25,400 --> 00:37:31,270
And to look out the window that my
great grandmother looked out when she

599
00:37:31,270 --> 00:37:34,000
was a housemate was pretty amazing.

600
00:37:34,410 --> 00:37:34,959
Beautiful.

601
00:37:34,959 --> 00:37:36,089
And I feel what

602
00:37:36,089 --> 00:37:40,970
Emily: I'd like to say to you is this, is
that as you start to shift more and more

603
00:37:40,970 --> 00:37:43,330
in consciousness, which is our awareness.

604
00:37:44,020 --> 00:37:48,070
You will start seeing things
that you never saw before.

605
00:37:48,150 --> 00:37:56,620
And what I mean by that is, is that you
become hyper aware of your surroundings.

606
00:37:57,400 --> 00:38:01,220
And everything within it so that
you will be told it's like people

607
00:38:01,260 --> 00:38:02,940
go, Oh my God, it's one, one, one.

608
00:38:02,940 --> 00:38:03,780
It's two, two, two.

609
00:38:03,780 --> 00:38:04,620
It's three, three, three.

610
00:38:04,620 --> 00:38:05,500
It's four, four, four.

611
00:38:05,910 --> 00:38:10,039
It's not all about numbers, but numbers
is a fantastic start because, you

612
00:38:10,039 --> 00:38:11,880
know, we're born within this matrix.

613
00:38:11,959 --> 00:38:12,820
We are in.

614
00:38:13,135 --> 00:38:14,555
The matrix is the womb.

615
00:38:14,965 --> 00:38:15,545
Okay.

616
00:38:16,015 --> 00:38:17,075
We are here.

617
00:38:17,075 --> 00:38:19,065
It's like we come in with amnesia.

618
00:38:19,205 --> 00:38:22,105
Not all because the children,
some of the children coming in

619
00:38:22,105 --> 00:38:25,124
today are already so awakened.

620
00:38:25,124 --> 00:38:29,025
It's not funny, but what
I'm trying to say is this.

621
00:38:29,065 --> 00:38:32,734
You will start talking and.

622
00:38:33,115 --> 00:38:37,065
For example, like me last week, I was
talking to a friend and I was about

623
00:38:37,115 --> 00:38:41,185
to tell her how I wanted to give up
on something, but I'm not quite there.

624
00:38:41,185 --> 00:38:44,485
It was actually the day I met you,
a couple of weeks ago this happened

625
00:38:45,005 --> 00:38:49,255
and you know, I was just talking
about, you know, in my head going,

626
00:38:49,255 --> 00:38:53,244
no, I'm going to give up on something
and then going actually, but no.

627
00:38:53,244 --> 00:38:56,004
And before I could even say
anything, I've looked up and I

628
00:38:56,004 --> 00:38:58,514
see three pelicans flying by.

629
00:38:59,760 --> 00:39:03,800
And I'm like, Oh my God, pelicans.

630
00:39:03,840 --> 00:39:04,700
And there's three.

631
00:39:04,730 --> 00:39:08,050
And then my girlfriend goes, Oh, but
it's three, three, three as well.

632
00:39:08,690 --> 00:39:12,460
But when you start looking up the
meanings of these threes expansion,

633
00:39:12,680 --> 00:39:16,684
that's the first thing it's about
the, you know, three, three, three.

634
00:39:16,775 --> 00:39:22,415
Creating that joy and harmony within
your life, the Pelican is all about

635
00:39:22,415 --> 00:39:26,884
abundance, but it also can be a
representation of the Phoenix, the

636
00:39:26,885 --> 00:39:29,185
birth, the death, the rebirth cycle.

637
00:39:29,595 --> 00:39:33,994
It could mean, you know, one sentence
when I did look it up, it's about, you

638
00:39:33,995 --> 00:39:37,794
know, don't give up because what you're
doing is you're on the right track.

639
00:39:38,074 --> 00:39:42,104
Sometimes things don't happen the way
we want them to happen, but that's

640
00:39:42,104 --> 00:39:45,399
okay because we're here to learn and.

641
00:39:45,610 --> 00:39:48,940
Not give up, but maybe it's,
you've got to look at a

642
00:39:48,940 --> 00:39:51,010
different way of doing something.

643
00:39:51,640 --> 00:39:55,260
It might be that, you know, like, I
guess I'm picturing you looking out

644
00:39:55,339 --> 00:40:00,409
the window of your grandmother's house
and there may have been a butterfly

645
00:40:00,409 --> 00:40:03,950
or an insect or, um, a flower that.

646
00:40:04,630 --> 00:40:07,910
You know, that just suck out to you.

647
00:40:08,630 --> 00:40:11,360
And then there's that symbolism behind it.

648
00:40:11,360 --> 00:40:14,590
See, everything has symbolism
and it's here for us.

649
00:40:14,590 --> 00:40:16,320
That is a part of our learning.

650
00:40:16,700 --> 00:40:18,970
It's that awareness that we can take on.

651
00:40:18,979 --> 00:40:22,610
You know, before I ran my
tour to Egypt last year.

652
00:40:23,105 --> 00:40:26,205
I kept getting, because I was in my head,
I was chewing and throwing, what am I

653
00:40:26,205 --> 00:40:30,575
doing, what am I doing, but all I kept
seeing was dragonflies, dragonflies,

654
00:40:30,575 --> 00:40:34,375
and I'm not kidding, to the point that
I saw, and I wish I'd picked it up even

655
00:40:34,375 --> 00:40:39,564
to this day, even though it was, it
was dead, but it was the biggest, most

656
00:40:39,564 --> 00:40:42,014
beautiful dragonfly I've ever seen.

657
00:40:42,565 --> 00:40:45,765
Dragonfly is all about
looking past the illusion.

658
00:40:46,235 --> 00:40:47,745
What are you telling yourself?

659
00:40:48,710 --> 00:40:54,800
You know, we create the illusions within
our lives, but again, it also is a part of

660
00:40:54,800 --> 00:40:57,670
that birth, death, rebirth cycle as well.

661
00:40:58,160 --> 00:41:02,159
It's about, you know, just because you
might be seeing something or some way or

662
00:41:02,200 --> 00:41:06,779
thinking of it in some way doesn't mean
that that's the actual way it's occurring.

663
00:41:07,119 --> 00:41:10,530
It's just the way that you're
creating the story in your head.

664
00:41:10,940 --> 00:41:14,140
Or it's like the news
we're watching, you know.

665
00:41:14,730 --> 00:41:19,370
Look at the last few years and what
the crap we've had been subjected to.

666
00:41:20,160 --> 00:41:23,680
A lot of it becomes an illusion
because it's mind control in the

667
00:41:23,680 --> 00:41:27,819
way if they want you, this is
how they want you to perceive it.

668
00:41:28,290 --> 00:41:30,070
But in actual fact, it's not.

669
00:41:30,460 --> 00:41:33,780
It's like last year in Egypt
when, you know, the war broke out.

670
00:41:34,270 --> 00:41:39,229
Egypt was totally unaffected,
but back here, they made it sound

671
00:41:39,229 --> 00:41:43,069
like, oh my God, you know, you're
in a war zone, get out of there.

672
00:41:43,460 --> 00:41:45,960
Probably safer than being
here in our own state.

673
00:41:46,675 --> 00:41:49,655
You know, with the politicians that
we had, do you know what I mean?

674
00:41:49,905 --> 00:41:54,175
Catherine: Yeah, I make a point
every morning to read multiple news

675
00:41:54,175 --> 00:41:56,134
sources, and they're all different.

676
00:41:56,465 --> 00:42:02,595
But what I'm fascinated about is, how does
someone learn what you're talking about?

677
00:42:03,085 --> 00:42:06,464
Emily: For me, it's the
research that I've done.

678
00:42:06,525 --> 00:42:10,605
It's listening to your gut, your
intuition as well, because your

679
00:42:10,605 --> 00:42:13,255
intuition is the GPS of the soul.

680
00:42:14,040 --> 00:42:17,190
And a lot of people, they ignore it.

681
00:42:17,980 --> 00:42:21,850
But you know, when you're in tune
with your higher selves, because when

682
00:42:21,850 --> 00:42:26,439
we channel information, most of the
time you're actually getting that

683
00:42:26,460 --> 00:42:28,470
information from your higher self.

684
00:42:28,880 --> 00:42:34,980
Even if it comes through as, like, for
example, a lot of my You know, before I

685
00:42:34,980 --> 00:42:42,490
went to Egypt in 2017 to 2018, for about
a year, a lot of what I was channeling

686
00:42:42,630 --> 00:42:48,840
came through Thoth, okay, the, the god
of wisdom, but I know it was still my

687
00:42:48,850 --> 00:42:54,910
higher self, but it was the aspect of
him that came through and that was what

688
00:42:54,940 --> 00:43:02,155
I was So, you know, it's about getting in
tune with your intuition is so important.

689
00:43:02,585 --> 00:43:07,484
What I was going to say before was, you
know, a week leading up to my mom's death.

690
00:43:08,120 --> 00:43:09,680
I kept having this dream.

691
00:43:10,020 --> 00:43:15,000
Now, not many people have prophetic
dreams, which means that it comes true.

692
00:43:15,600 --> 00:43:20,250
And I have to say, there's only two times
that I've actually had a prophetic dream.

693
00:43:20,930 --> 00:43:23,869
But this one, all I kept seeing
was the time four o'clock,

694
00:43:23,870 --> 00:43:24,909
four o'clock, four o'clock.

695
00:43:24,910 --> 00:43:28,210
And I'm going, Oh my God,
what is this all about?

696
00:43:29,160 --> 00:43:29,890
Anyway.

697
00:43:30,175 --> 00:43:35,505
I think I knew deep down what it was
about, and I'd written to my auntie,

698
00:43:35,525 --> 00:43:39,925
so my mom's sister, and immediately,
like my sisters, and my dad at the

699
00:43:39,925 --> 00:43:42,125
time, and said, look, keep having this.

700
00:43:42,635 --> 00:43:47,715
Dream and I, it's repetitive about
four o'clock the day before my mum

701
00:43:47,715 --> 00:43:53,695
died, we had a meeting with the nurse
that night and you know, it was like,

702
00:43:53,705 --> 00:43:55,285
okay, are we going to sit vigil?

703
00:43:55,495 --> 00:44:00,544
And all I could think about in my head
was, no, we don't need to like, it's

704
00:44:00,555 --> 00:44:05,985
not a necessity at this point because
what I realized when my head that I was

705
00:44:05,985 --> 00:44:09,965
saying is like, she's not going to die
before four o'clock in the afternoon.

706
00:44:10,465 --> 00:44:12,384
That was what I kept feeling.

707
00:44:12,895 --> 00:44:17,805
Anyway, my sister's like, okay, I'm
going to stay overnight with mum.

708
00:44:17,805 --> 00:44:20,715
And I said, look, you know, that's
beautiful, but I don't believe

709
00:44:20,715 --> 00:44:21,975
she's going to die tonight.

710
00:44:22,455 --> 00:44:25,654
Anyway, came to the next
day, mum was still with us.

711
00:44:26,465 --> 00:44:30,615
And as the day, you know, we all came
in because we knew she was dying.

712
00:44:31,605 --> 00:44:36,935
And what was interesting was
I just kept saying to her, you

713
00:44:36,935 --> 00:44:39,835
know, can you see your dad?

714
00:44:39,835 --> 00:44:41,694
Can you see my husband?

715
00:44:41,694 --> 00:44:41,844
And.

716
00:44:42,630 --> 00:44:48,110
And even though she couldn't talk
and her eyes were closed, she could,

717
00:44:48,530 --> 00:44:51,920
you know, because they say the
last sense to go is your hearing.

718
00:44:52,440 --> 00:44:55,469
And so she could definitely hear
me and she could understand me.

719
00:44:55,469 --> 00:44:59,549
And I kept saying to her, can you
see Rob, which is my husband's name?

720
00:45:00,299 --> 00:45:01,660
And she kept going like this.

721
00:45:01,730 --> 00:45:02,399
And it was the best.

722
00:45:02,640 --> 00:45:07,700
Probably, I don't know, within the
hour of her passing maybe, I asked

723
00:45:07,700 --> 00:45:12,150
her again and you know, like I kept
talking to her and taking through,

724
00:45:12,190 --> 00:45:17,389
you know, the visualization that I
guess, you know, we feel could exist

725
00:45:17,390 --> 00:45:22,380
in terms of, you know, walking up this
set of stairs and this beautiful white

726
00:45:22,380 --> 00:45:24,110
and golden light being behind it.

727
00:45:24,955 --> 00:45:27,865
And, you know, who could you
see up the top of the staircase?

728
00:45:28,005 --> 00:45:31,485
And then I remember saying to her
at this point, Can you see Rob?

729
00:45:31,555 --> 00:45:33,465
And she actually nodded yes.

730
00:45:33,485 --> 00:45:34,815
And I was like, Oh my God.

731
00:45:35,255 --> 00:45:37,244
But my mum passed away at 4.

732
00:45:37,375 --> 00:45:37,905
01pm.

733
00:45:38,674 --> 00:45:42,085
And it was like, Oh my God.

734
00:45:42,415 --> 00:45:46,905
Like my dream has been telling me
this is the time she will be passing.

735
00:45:47,645 --> 00:45:52,105
And I remember when we were
waiting in the room for the funeral

736
00:45:52,125 --> 00:45:54,265
directors to come take the body.

737
00:45:54,725 --> 00:46:02,295
And all I could hear so loud and clear
was thank you, thank you, in my head.

738
00:46:02,305 --> 00:46:05,905
And my mum was just there
talking to me and talking to me.

739
00:46:06,434 --> 00:46:10,795
And I remember, you know, a little
while after like dad decided he

740
00:46:10,795 --> 00:46:14,895
wanted to sell some pieces in the
house, like the furniture and whatnot.

741
00:46:14,895 --> 00:46:19,445
So I don't know if you or your audience
have ever had experiences with the

742
00:46:19,445 --> 00:46:24,925
afterlife and another beautiful way
in which we can actually see these.

743
00:46:25,510 --> 00:46:28,280
divine souls around us is through orbs.

744
00:46:28,880 --> 00:46:31,930
Orbs or you may see silhouettes.

745
00:46:31,930 --> 00:46:36,390
There are so many different ways,
but when I'd taken these photos,

746
00:46:36,430 --> 00:46:42,620
the most magnificent orb was on the
couch and it was all rainbow colors.

747
00:46:42,620 --> 00:46:45,760
And I knew that specifically was my mum.

748
00:46:46,070 --> 00:46:48,320
Catherine: And is that
orb, is that a ball of

749
00:46:49,385 --> 00:46:49,895
Emily: Yeah.

750
00:46:50,555 --> 00:46:50,725
Okay.

751
00:46:50,955 --> 00:46:53,975
And they can present themselves in
different ways though, sometimes

752
00:46:54,375 --> 00:46:56,035
there'll be different colors.

753
00:46:56,045 --> 00:47:01,095
They'll be like, I've got pictures of,
you know, people at a pink party and

754
00:47:01,095 --> 00:47:05,845
there are orbs in there that are pink
because they match the color of the party.

755
00:47:06,384 --> 00:47:10,505
I have this picture of when my husband
first died and understand that I

756
00:47:10,515 --> 00:47:12,275
wasn't into all this at the time.

757
00:47:12,275 --> 00:47:15,134
Like I was, you know, I probably
was only just 17 years old.

758
00:47:15,225 --> 00:47:19,165
Starting to learn, you know, it was
the first time at 32 or that I even

759
00:47:19,165 --> 00:47:23,045
went ever went and saw my first
psychic and it was her that said

760
00:47:23,095 --> 00:47:28,554
things again to me that really opened
my eyes and went, Oh my God, like,

761
00:47:28,564 --> 00:47:30,124
for example, I'll just go back to it.

762
00:47:30,845 --> 00:47:35,345
She actually told me the, it was like
the Last Supper, that's how I call it.

763
00:47:35,345 --> 00:47:41,505
It was the last time my husband had a game
of cards at our home and we were playing,

764
00:47:41,505 --> 00:47:43,215
they were playing in the lounge room.

765
00:47:43,664 --> 00:47:47,074
And she actually
visualized the whole thing.

766
00:47:47,074 --> 00:47:49,174
It could tell me even where
my husband was sitting.

767
00:47:49,174 --> 00:47:50,885
Like, it freaked me out.

768
00:47:50,935 --> 00:47:55,340
But some, you know, when they're
good, they can really, You know, some

769
00:47:55,340 --> 00:48:00,020
can really hone in on these things,
but I have this beautiful picture.

770
00:48:00,050 --> 00:48:01,270
I'll have to share it with you.

771
00:48:01,270 --> 00:48:02,330
I can send it to you.

772
00:48:02,690 --> 00:48:06,369
We had gone to Walhalla with the
kids and a friend of mine, it was my

773
00:48:06,370 --> 00:48:12,509
husband's best friend, and I had this
picture and I didn't realize until

774
00:48:12,580 --> 00:48:14,074
a few years later that it was me.

775
00:48:14,115 --> 00:48:20,655
That there are these two massive orbs,
and I feel they're maybe more angelic

776
00:48:21,015 --> 00:48:24,785
and you can see the purple silhouette
around them, but you can see that they're

777
00:48:24,795 --> 00:48:31,004
actually traveling upward, they're not
going down and oh my goodness, just,

778
00:48:31,154 --> 00:48:34,364
you know, when you start seeing things.

779
00:48:34,845 --> 00:48:37,885
These sorts of things,
you can't unsee them, you

780
00:48:37,885 --> 00:48:38,705
Catherine: know, so.

781
00:48:38,985 --> 00:48:40,905
And where can you read about this?

782
00:48:40,915 --> 00:48:43,645
You say that you've
done a lot of research.

783
00:48:43,675 --> 00:48:43,695
Yeah.

784
00:48:43,695 --> 00:48:48,865
Is it, is it numerology or what are
the sort of things that you look up?

785
00:48:49,725 --> 00:48:50,415
Emily: Look it up.

786
00:48:50,685 --> 00:48:52,534
What is it that you're interested in?

787
00:48:52,555 --> 00:48:53,354
Look up orbs.

788
00:48:53,445 --> 00:48:54,775
Look up numerology.

789
00:48:55,015 --> 00:48:56,305
This is what it's all about.

790
00:48:56,325 --> 00:48:56,635
It's just that.

791
00:48:56,870 --> 00:48:58,040
Starting to research.

792
00:48:58,040 --> 00:48:59,210
That's how I started.

793
00:48:59,500 --> 00:49:01,010
I started doing courses.

794
00:49:01,010 --> 00:49:05,020
I found myself interested in
doing things, you know, my

795
00:49:05,020 --> 00:49:06,900
interest became sacred geometry.

796
00:49:07,180 --> 00:49:11,300
Hence, I created a deck of cards
all based on sacred geometry.

797
00:49:11,579 --> 00:49:12,519
The reason why,

798
00:49:12,799 --> 00:49:13,540
Catherine: and can you talk

799
00:49:13,590 --> 00:49:14,379
Emily: us through that?

800
00:49:14,760 --> 00:49:15,000
Yeah.

801
00:49:15,000 --> 00:49:15,400
So.

802
00:49:15,770 --> 00:49:20,060
When I said I started creating, you
know, playing with essences and making

803
00:49:20,060 --> 00:49:25,839
crystal essences, what I eventually
did was that from probably about 2010

804
00:49:25,840 --> 00:49:30,839
onwards, I actually started creating
elixirs and the elixirs because

805
00:49:30,839 --> 00:49:34,990
they're a synergy of energy that you're
putting together and what I ended up

806
00:49:34,990 --> 00:49:40,625
doing was Doing is I've actually got
a whole set of vibrational elixirs.

807
00:49:40,625 --> 00:49:43,955
So you have probably
heard of flower essences.

808
00:49:44,235 --> 00:49:48,915
You've probably heard of, you
know, your bath remedies that you

809
00:49:48,915 --> 00:49:50,404
can buy even from the chemist.

810
00:49:50,915 --> 00:49:55,515
Well, they're based on the same ideal
where you're working with a certain

811
00:49:55,535 --> 00:49:58,125
energy and it's a frequency in water.

812
00:49:58,545 --> 00:49:59,075
Okay.

813
00:49:59,560 --> 00:50:03,770
And these I've created, like, so
you're working as a complimentary

814
00:50:03,770 --> 00:50:08,230
therapy and they're working
on the mind, body and soul.

815
00:50:08,279 --> 00:50:12,870
It's all about nurturing, balancing,
healing, all aspects of ourselves.

816
00:50:12,920 --> 00:50:17,500
Again, complimentary, it doesn't,
you know, you don't stop taking

817
00:50:17,500 --> 00:50:19,509
whatever medication you're on for it.

818
00:50:19,510 --> 00:50:23,440
It works fine and it will not
interfere with anything because.

819
00:50:23,830 --> 00:50:24,760
It's frequency.

820
00:50:24,760 --> 00:50:28,610
It's an energy that is, you
know, kept within a water.

821
00:50:29,210 --> 00:50:35,190
So what then started happening was when
I started creating them, I would create

822
00:50:35,190 --> 00:50:42,810
these templates and I create and use
these templates to then make my elixirs.

823
00:50:42,930 --> 00:50:43,660
And.

824
00:50:44,355 --> 00:50:50,745
It got to a point that I could no
longer create the templates on my own.

825
00:50:51,195 --> 00:50:57,004
I was finding that what I was channeling
was just becoming more and more complex.

826
00:50:57,034 --> 00:51:02,584
Like it was just too hard for me to even,
you know, cut and paste, which was what I

827
00:51:02,584 --> 00:51:05,015
was really good at doing back in the day.

828
00:51:05,935 --> 00:51:08,245
And so I found myself a digital artist.

829
00:51:08,375 --> 00:51:15,230
And what he did for me is I would
send him my cuttings and pastings and

830
00:51:15,230 --> 00:51:17,530
say, this is the concept that I have.

831
00:51:18,465 --> 00:51:19,565
Can you help me?

832
00:51:19,615 --> 00:51:22,815
Can you put them and
create a template for me?

833
00:51:23,175 --> 00:51:28,625
So the very first one I did, because it
was based on spider and spider medicine.

834
00:51:29,324 --> 00:51:37,454
So what I created was, this view might
look like a web, but the actual within

835
00:51:37,455 --> 00:51:43,265
the web is based on a particular
geometry that I call Metatron's cube.

836
00:51:43,485 --> 00:51:46,915
And I couldn't, I just couldn't
visualize how to do that.

837
00:51:46,915 --> 00:51:46,984
Okay.

838
00:51:47,205 --> 00:51:48,995
And create it on my own.

839
00:51:48,995 --> 00:51:51,765
So I needed his help from that.

840
00:51:51,865 --> 00:51:54,865
I then saw my second one
and this is the Merkabah.

841
00:51:55,275 --> 00:51:55,664
Okay.

842
00:51:55,664 --> 00:51:59,505
The star tetrahedron working
with this and I've gone, Oh my

843
00:51:59,505 --> 00:52:01,414
God, can you create it for me?

844
00:52:01,415 --> 00:52:03,415
There's another one I
would like to create.

845
00:52:03,975 --> 00:52:06,005
And then it went on and on and on.

846
00:52:06,055 --> 00:52:06,635
Catherine: Yeah, right.

847
00:52:06,895 --> 00:52:08,355
That's quite a complex shape.

848
00:52:09,150 --> 00:52:11,470
It's almost looks like when you
look through a kaleidoscope.

849
00:52:11,760 --> 00:52:12,720
Absolutely.

850
00:52:12,770 --> 00:52:13,000
Gives

851
00:52:13,000 --> 00:52:13,790
Emily: you that look.

852
00:52:13,830 --> 00:52:15,260
This is Metatron too.

853
00:52:15,970 --> 00:52:18,590
And the complexity of it is there.

854
00:52:19,080 --> 00:52:22,439
But for me, like, Rebirth is all
about snake medicine because it's

855
00:52:22,439 --> 00:52:25,279
that next level of transmutation.

856
00:52:25,290 --> 00:52:26,940
You know, it's shedding your skin.

857
00:52:27,250 --> 00:52:30,190
And this is what we are always
going through when we're going

858
00:52:30,190 --> 00:52:33,300
through that scenic moment
of birth, death, and rebirth.

859
00:52:34,175 --> 00:52:34,585
And how do

860
00:52:34,735 --> 00:52:35,905
Catherine: you use the cards?

861
00:52:36,005 --> 00:52:41,505
Emily: So they're an oracle, I've actually
called them a healing deck of cards and

862
00:52:41,515 --> 00:52:45,935
they are actually used so because again
everything has an energy signature.

863
00:52:46,614 --> 00:52:50,155
So for me and each one of these
cards has its own meaning just

864
00:52:50,234 --> 00:52:51,865
as the water frequencies do.

865
00:52:52,420 --> 00:52:57,530
So with this, you can actually lie it
on the body, you could lie it under

866
00:52:57,530 --> 00:52:59,720
the table, you know, if you're working.

867
00:52:59,720 --> 00:53:05,659
So I do have a number of chiropractors,
kinesiologists that actually work

868
00:53:05,659 --> 00:53:09,430
with these cards and they use it
within their healing work as well.

869
00:53:10,000 --> 00:53:13,420
Or you could actually get a
glass of water, you could sit it

870
00:53:13,440 --> 00:53:18,030
on the top and you could leave
it overnight or during the day.

871
00:53:18,320 --> 00:53:20,460
And remember everything is with intention.

872
00:53:20,650 --> 00:53:20,990
Okay.

873
00:53:21,299 --> 00:53:26,480
With that intention, you are then,
you know, absorbing the energy

874
00:53:26,580 --> 00:53:28,670
of this template into your water.

875
00:53:29,070 --> 00:53:31,410
These can then be used as a grid.

876
00:53:32,200 --> 00:53:37,450
And you could get crystals, you can
get fur, you could get fruit, you could

877
00:53:37,450 --> 00:53:41,040
get names like love or a person's name.

878
00:53:41,259 --> 00:53:44,269
You can take a picture
of whatever it might be.

879
00:53:44,270 --> 00:53:45,399
It doesn't matter.

880
00:53:45,780 --> 00:53:50,620
You know, it's about what your perception
is, what it is your intention is, and

881
00:53:50,620 --> 00:53:53,760
then what it is that you're going to
create and how you're going to place

882
00:53:53,840 --> 00:53:57,610
all the aspects of your pieces on.

883
00:53:57,905 --> 00:54:01,915
To create the temp, you know, a grid
that you want to create all of this.

884
00:54:01,965 --> 00:54:04,495
You can see things like
this on my website as well.

885
00:54:04,545 --> 00:54:04,975
And just

886
00:54:04,975 --> 00:54:09,554
Catherine: going back to your phoenix
elixirs, is that something you drink

887
00:54:09,554 --> 00:54:11,185
or something you place on the body?

888
00:54:11,665 --> 00:54:12,185
Drink,

889
00:54:12,434 --> 00:54:12,744
Emily: drink.

890
00:54:12,825 --> 00:54:13,165
Okay.

891
00:54:13,465 --> 00:54:14,815
So they've got alcohol in them.

892
00:54:14,815 --> 00:54:18,095
They're kept with alcohol, very
minimal, but you drink them.

893
00:54:18,095 --> 00:54:19,305
You can put them in your water.

894
00:54:19,305 --> 00:54:20,465
You can put them in your food.

895
00:54:20,465 --> 00:54:21,245
You can carry them.

896
00:54:21,245 --> 00:54:24,345
Like for the last two days,
I've actually had one in my bra.

897
00:54:24,395 --> 00:54:24,685
Like.

898
00:54:24,860 --> 00:54:27,990
You know, because I just want to
be with that energy signature.

899
00:54:28,300 --> 00:54:31,860
I've been drinking it, you know,
I've still been taking it in

900
00:54:31,880 --> 00:54:36,230
bed, you know, I want to keep
the frequency around me as well.

901
00:54:36,610 --> 00:54:40,260
So yes, you can use it
in all different ways.

902
00:54:40,610 --> 00:54:41,820
There's not one way.

903
00:54:42,030 --> 00:54:47,100
You can actually even go onto
my website and on the homepage,

904
00:54:47,180 --> 00:54:52,230
you can download a PDF on the
lab, the liquid Alchemina bottle.

905
00:54:52,230 --> 00:54:59,140
So, you know, when the Phoenix
actually, or like the Phoenix, like

906
00:54:59,140 --> 00:55:04,430
you see it here, the Phoenix, like
you see it on the, off the back of

907
00:55:04,440 --> 00:55:08,150
my cards, this is all about my life.

908
00:55:08,515 --> 00:55:14,695
And to me, from very early on, saw
myself as the phoenix, because it's

909
00:55:14,705 --> 00:55:16,985
my story of birth, death, and rebirth.

910
00:55:17,015 --> 00:55:17,975
It's every time.

911
00:55:17,975 --> 00:55:20,295
It's not about the physical death.

912
00:55:20,925 --> 00:55:23,804
It's about an energetic.

913
00:55:24,165 --> 00:55:30,225
Death that we have gone through because
we're either after our loss, our letting

914
00:55:30,235 --> 00:55:33,735
go, we've gone through that one level.

915
00:55:34,055 --> 00:55:37,074
It's time to raise our vibration.

916
00:55:37,354 --> 00:55:39,805
And this is what we are here to learn.

917
00:55:39,875 --> 00:55:43,995
This is what we're here to do is, you
know, this is part of what I was saying

918
00:55:44,015 --> 00:55:49,950
before, you know, for me, it's not just
about love and love of self, which So

919
00:55:50,010 --> 00:55:55,640
important because that brings in so
many other aspects of self awareness

920
00:55:55,640 --> 00:56:00,740
and self worth and being enough, but
it's that raising our consciousness.

921
00:56:00,740 --> 00:56:05,079
It's awakening that
consciousness within ourselves.

922
00:56:05,480 --> 00:56:10,229
And as we do that, we're able to
shift to these higher levels of

923
00:56:10,239 --> 00:56:16,069
frequencies that we get to a point
that we will be eventually be able to.

924
00:56:16,270 --> 00:56:23,570
Drop those lower frequencies of
anger and fear and pain and come

925
00:56:23,570 --> 00:56:29,079
just from that higher vibration of
love, you know, and more balance.

926
00:56:29,109 --> 00:56:31,030
And this is what we're here to do.

927
00:56:31,359 --> 00:56:32,610
And each one of us.

928
00:56:33,190 --> 00:56:39,360
Chose to come here for a reason at this
point in time, and each one of us has also

929
00:56:39,420 --> 00:56:42,010
chosen the lessons we are here to learn.

930
00:56:42,339 --> 00:56:48,450
And for some, they are tragic, you know,
whether it's a plane crash, I mean, this

931
00:56:48,450 --> 00:56:53,070
is awful to say, but, You know, you're
going from your plane crashes or your

932
00:56:53,070 --> 00:56:58,440
major accidents or your sexual abuse
or to having cancer and, and death.

933
00:56:58,910 --> 00:57:00,930
These are our teachings.

934
00:57:01,120 --> 00:57:06,479
I can't tell you why we chose them,
but I very much believe that we choose

935
00:57:06,479 --> 00:57:08,860
that blueprint before we come here.

936
00:57:09,160 --> 00:57:13,359
My husband's dying, my brother in
law's dying, my mother's dying,

937
00:57:13,369 --> 00:57:16,199
my stepmother, they're dying.

938
00:57:16,429 --> 00:57:19,669
I mean, they're all there to teach.

939
00:57:20,490 --> 00:57:26,660
Something, it wasn't just happening
to them, you know, it's also happening

940
00:57:26,970 --> 00:57:32,650
for us and I can tell you, my
mother in law passed away in 2017.

941
00:57:32,660 --> 00:57:34,910
She had a major heart attack.

942
00:57:35,589 --> 00:57:39,090
I can tell you, she died
of a very broken heart.

943
00:57:39,670 --> 00:57:44,829
When we think about the heart as the
organ and you know, an association to it.

944
00:57:45,325 --> 00:57:51,055
Of course, there are other aspects
involved, but this is a very big part of.

945
00:57:51,550 --> 00:57:56,770
Her dying and she she had the choice
to rectify that but she never did

946
00:57:57,250 --> 00:58:01,800
Catherine: And so given the knowledge
that you have now, when you look back

947
00:58:01,800 --> 00:58:08,360
retrospectively on your experiences,
what do you feel those experiences

948
00:58:08,870 --> 00:58:10,230
Emily: have shared with you?

949
00:58:10,759 --> 00:58:11,980
God, so many.

950
00:58:12,070 --> 00:58:13,150
I don't fear death.

951
00:58:13,680 --> 00:58:19,770
And that's something that definitely
changed after I had loss and found

952
00:58:20,320 --> 00:58:25,910
myself, you know, I had such a thirst
for the esoteric, that, that gnosis,

953
00:58:25,930 --> 00:58:29,859
you know, the knowing, the spiritual
that was out, that's out there.

954
00:58:29,859 --> 00:58:34,600
And I still do, like I go down more
rabbit holes than you can think of, but

955
00:58:34,600 --> 00:58:39,130
that's okay because we're all entitled
to a belief system and our perception.

956
00:58:39,250 --> 00:58:43,170
Catherine: And if you don't mind me
asking, what was your heritage, Emily?

957
00:58:43,185 --> 00:58:49,175
Emily: So my background is you're
the European heritage, you know,

958
00:58:49,305 --> 00:58:55,374
and I had a very mixed, you
know, very, very, very mixed, the

959
00:58:55,374 --> 00:58:59,095
Polish, the German, the Israeli.

960
00:58:59,395 --> 00:59:02,765
You know, and then my children,
it was, you know, we, we

961
00:59:02,765 --> 00:59:04,165
went into a mixed marriage.

962
00:59:04,165 --> 00:59:09,384
So, and I just want to really stress that
I do not follow religion, but it never

963
00:59:09,434 --> 00:59:11,945
impacted on my immediate family ever.

964
00:59:12,415 --> 00:59:16,755
That was my choice and my husband as
well, because we were both brought into

965
00:59:17,454 --> 00:59:18,824
different religion, different faith.

966
00:59:19,520 --> 00:59:21,860
Catherine: What were you
originally, when you raised?

967
00:59:22,160 --> 00:59:26,420
Emily: Well, the religious
part, aspect is Jewish.

968
00:59:26,910 --> 00:59:27,270
Jewish?

969
00:59:27,650 --> 00:59:29,690
And my husband Catholic.

970
00:59:30,000 --> 00:59:31,920
So very, very mixed.

971
00:59:33,030 --> 00:59:36,420
But I don't go there, like
it's, I just don't go there.

972
00:59:36,529 --> 00:59:38,960
I, I, I'm not into religion whatsoever.

973
00:59:39,300 --> 00:59:43,340
And I feel religion, sadly, even
though people use it because they need

974
00:59:43,340 --> 00:59:44,940
a faith and something to believe in.

975
00:59:45,260 --> 00:59:45,670
And that's okay.

976
00:59:46,920 --> 00:59:52,160
But religion has also destroyed
so much of our world and the peace

977
00:59:52,170 --> 00:59:56,420
that we have within it because it's
been used for the wrong reasons.

978
00:59:56,490 --> 01:00:02,460
And I actually want to just in saying that
neither of us believed in God at the time.

979
01:00:02,460 --> 01:00:07,819
So, you know, and you got to remember
at that point, I, and I'll explain why I

980
01:00:07,819 --> 01:00:13,100
say this in a minute, but neither of us
believed in God by the time Just before

981
01:00:13,100 --> 01:00:17,160
he died, because we couldn't understand,
you know, there was that anger.

982
01:00:17,610 --> 01:00:19,500
Why are you taking him away from me?

983
01:00:19,500 --> 01:00:20,200
He's not ready.

984
01:00:20,200 --> 01:00:21,470
He doesn't want to die.

985
01:00:21,850 --> 01:00:26,660
But understanding that on a higher
level, on a, his soul made this contract.

986
01:00:26,720 --> 01:00:28,810
This is what his life was to be.

987
01:00:28,820 --> 01:00:29,840
He didn't even make it to 38.

988
01:00:31,060 --> 01:00:35,130
You know, I'm 52 and I'm well
past the year that he passed.

989
01:00:36,190 --> 01:00:38,865
Because We lost so much faith.

990
01:00:39,465 --> 01:00:42,495
We both said it's, there's
not going to be any church.

991
01:00:42,505 --> 01:00:43,845
Like we didn't get married in church.

992
01:00:43,845 --> 01:00:45,565
We got married in the gardens anyway.

993
01:00:46,095 --> 01:00:49,054
No religion's going to come
into, you know, the wake.

994
01:00:49,085 --> 01:00:53,495
It's all going to just
be done by a celebrant.

995
01:00:53,505 --> 01:00:53,635
Yeah.

996
01:00:54,044 --> 01:00:54,464
Thank you.

997
01:00:54,765 --> 01:00:55,294
A celebrant.

998
01:00:55,704 --> 01:00:56,365
And that's what we did.

999
01:00:56,475 --> 01:00:57,225
We had a celebrant.

1000
01:00:57,500 --> 01:01:00,370
Just as we got married, you know,
a celebrant, when we got married,

1001
01:01:00,370 --> 01:01:01,670
a celebrant, when he passed.

1002
01:01:02,530 --> 01:01:05,840
And I think one of the things that's
really, really important to understand,

1003
01:01:05,840 --> 01:01:10,219
and you know, the audience may or
may not understand this, but when

1004
01:01:10,219 --> 01:01:16,889
we are told that we are made in
the eyes of God, that is the truth.

1005
01:01:17,479 --> 01:01:25,355
You know, there is, God, you know, as
above so below, the God that is out

1006
01:01:25,355 --> 01:01:30,915
there or the consciousness that we
consider a God is also the consciousness

1007
01:01:30,925 --> 01:01:33,184
of what we have within ourselves.

1008
01:01:33,605 --> 01:01:37,924
So what is out there on one level is
what we also have within ourselves.

1009
01:01:37,935 --> 01:01:43,045
It's we are God because we are
made in exact likeness of God.

1010
01:01:43,375 --> 01:01:46,774
And to say that there is
just, you know, one God.

1011
01:01:47,405 --> 01:01:50,845
It, it doesn't, you know, this is
again, opening up, I guess, a rabbit

1012
01:01:50,845 --> 01:01:55,315
hole, which, you know, I don't need
to go down, but it's, it's just that

1013
01:01:55,355 --> 01:02:02,015
understanding that, you know, religion
was created, but before the religion

1014
01:02:02,015 --> 01:02:04,614
was there, everyone was the same.

1015
01:02:04,685 --> 01:02:09,045
We were all the same in our belief
systems and, you know, the way in

1016
01:02:09,045 --> 01:02:12,045
which we came into the world to
go out into the world, you know.

1017
01:02:12,575 --> 01:02:16,185
So, religion was then created to control.

1018
01:02:16,505 --> 01:02:20,735
And this we can see through the
churches and what it creates from that.

1019
01:02:21,215 --> 01:02:26,780
And, you know, I think It hasn't done a
lot of good for a lot of people either.

1020
01:02:27,400 --> 01:02:33,790
So in saying this, you know, for me, it,
I take, my religion is my spirituality.

1021
01:02:34,320 --> 01:02:38,370
It is what I see and what I
know and what I understand.

1022
01:02:38,930 --> 01:02:42,229
And that's, you know,
that's how I see my life.

1023
01:02:42,515 --> 01:02:48,045
And I think it's just so much more
beautiful because it doesn't restrict

1024
01:02:48,045 --> 01:02:53,475
you to being in this tiny little box
where you have to be told that you

1025
01:02:53,485 --> 01:02:57,724
have to, you know, it's like, do you
really believe, for example, I say

1026
01:02:57,725 --> 01:03:02,925
for the Jewish people that, you know,
oh, here comes the Sabbath, you're not

1027
01:03:02,925 --> 01:03:06,135
allowed to touch lights, you're not
allowed to drive, you're not allowed

1028
01:03:06,135 --> 01:03:09,745
to, you know, You're not allowed to do
this, you're not allowed to do that.

1029
01:03:09,845 --> 01:03:12,255
Do you really think he wrote
that and put it in a bible?

1030
01:03:12,815 --> 01:03:13,515
I don't think so.

1031
01:03:13,905 --> 01:03:16,945
Like, you know, when you start
thinking about certain aspects,

1032
01:03:16,945 --> 01:03:19,294
you go, where does this come from?

1033
01:03:19,355 --> 01:03:22,304
You know, where did these
stipulations come in?

1034
01:03:22,334 --> 01:03:25,425
But again, Mean it to be about religion.

1035
01:03:25,455 --> 01:03:29,515
'cause I just, I don't, I don't
practice and I don't go there.

1036
01:03:30,125 --> 01:03:30,275
Catherine: Mm-Hmm.

1037
01:03:30,875 --> 01:03:32,525
Emily: I just believe in my own stuff.

1038
01:03:33,215 --> 01:03:36,685
Catherine: Well, you've certainly
found your own spirituality,

1039
01:03:37,065 --> 01:03:41,255
you know, and growth since
the deaths of your loved ones.

1040
01:03:42,285 --> 01:03:46,745
Given your personal experience,
is there any advice or

1041
01:03:46,745 --> 01:03:48,095
encouragement that you'd like

1042
01:03:48,095 --> 01:03:48,545
Emily: to share?

1043
01:03:49,225 --> 01:03:53,855
Don't ever give up, don't allow the
grief to consume you, there is always

1044
01:03:53,865 --> 01:03:58,305
help out there and don't ever feel
embarrassed, you know, if you feel

1045
01:03:58,305 --> 01:04:04,195
you can't ask for that help because
you would be surprised, you just have

1046
01:04:04,195 --> 01:04:07,914
to turn your head and there would be
someone there willing to offer it.

1047
01:04:08,414 --> 01:04:13,445
My children were very young at
the time, so at that time I had

1048
01:04:13,545 --> 01:04:16,035
amazing support systems in place.

1049
01:04:16,900 --> 01:04:19,880
I actually got them all art therapy.

1050
01:04:19,880 --> 01:04:23,860
So that last, I can't remember
now how long I did it for, but

1051
01:04:23,860 --> 01:04:28,720
through the council, I was able
to get them art therapy so that

1052
01:04:28,740 --> 01:04:30,680
they had a form of expression.

1053
01:04:31,160 --> 01:04:34,550
I joined a group at the time,
and I honestly don't even know

1054
01:04:34,550 --> 01:04:37,530
if it still exists, but it's
just, there are groups out there.

1055
01:04:37,820 --> 01:04:39,870
It was called Kids Grieve Too.

1056
01:04:40,730 --> 01:04:46,230
So, we would send the kids there,
because remember my brother in law

1057
01:04:46,230 --> 01:04:51,100
died two weeks before, and so he
had two girls, young girls as well.

1058
01:04:51,550 --> 01:04:57,030
And so, you know, all the kids would go
together to these meetings, you know,

1059
01:04:57,030 --> 01:05:03,260
and My youngest son who was seven at the
time when my mum died, what was really

1060
01:05:03,260 --> 01:05:08,310
interesting, so I had counselling for
him at the time and each one of them went

1061
01:05:08,310 --> 01:05:12,230
through their own thing, like remember,
we're all individuals, so not, school's

1062
01:05:12,230 --> 01:05:16,100
not going to be for everyone, just
like certain therapy and counselling

1063
01:05:16,100 --> 01:05:17,270
is not going to be for everyone.

1064
01:05:17,560 --> 01:05:21,280
I'm just vaguely remembering I had
another counsellor actually over at the

1065
01:05:21,280 --> 01:05:25,509
Austin hospital at the time as well,
which we saw a few times, actually that

1066
01:05:25,510 --> 01:05:31,525
was more for me than it was So, you
know, I had a lot of things in place,

1067
01:05:31,885 --> 01:05:36,195
but my son, you know, being seven, he
told my mom, he wouldn't let her die.

1068
01:05:36,675 --> 01:05:37,564
She died.

1069
01:05:38,145 --> 01:05:41,644
Children have such concrete ways,
you know, their way of thinking is

1070
01:05:41,645 --> 01:05:45,655
so concrete that he really believed.

1071
01:05:46,260 --> 01:05:50,270
It was his fault that she died and
it wasn't, we had to go through

1072
01:05:50,290 --> 01:05:54,220
counseling because he had to
understand that it wasn't his fault.

1073
01:05:54,710 --> 01:05:56,240
He couldn't have saved her.

1074
01:05:56,639 --> 01:06:01,580
So it's, you know, it's really,
really important to have something

1075
01:06:01,580 --> 01:06:02,810
in place for your children.

1076
01:06:03,200 --> 01:06:06,579
Take any support you can get,
even if it's about, you know,

1077
01:06:06,789 --> 01:06:08,579
meals being prepped for you.

1078
01:06:09,130 --> 01:06:14,570
Accept whatever comes like, because
you're going to need that support

1079
01:06:14,690 --> 01:06:19,470
as best you can, you know, at that
point in time and find something

1080
01:06:19,490 --> 01:06:22,310
as the parent, it's okay to grieve.

1081
01:06:22,320 --> 01:06:24,260
You need to have that process.

1082
01:06:24,599 --> 01:06:27,739
It's also, I think, so
important to understand that

1083
01:06:27,739 --> 01:06:29,970
grief doesn't ever go away.

1084
01:06:30,410 --> 01:06:32,870
It just gets so much easier to deal with.

1085
01:06:33,190 --> 01:06:34,930
The further down the track you are.

1086
01:06:35,530 --> 01:06:42,100
So, you know, even 20 years later,
actually for my mom and 17, I sat

1087
01:06:42,100 --> 01:06:44,769
on the couch that weekend I met you.

1088
01:06:45,140 --> 01:06:49,890
And because I, it was the weekend I did
my knee and I was watching something.

1089
01:06:50,070 --> 01:06:54,410
And it just brought tears to my eyes
because it made me miss not only my

1090
01:06:54,420 --> 01:06:56,610
mum actually, but my mother in law.

1091
01:06:56,900 --> 01:07:00,330
And I was actually saying out
aloud, I miss you, I miss you.

1092
01:07:00,330 --> 01:07:04,520
So no, it's okay to still
have those moments of tears.

1093
01:07:04,840 --> 01:07:10,420
One of the things that we've done also,
and this worked really well, especially

1094
01:07:10,420 --> 01:07:15,659
having young children, we stopped
doing it probably after about 10 years.

1095
01:07:16,350 --> 01:07:21,730
But with my husband, what we did
on his anniversary every year is we

1096
01:07:21,730 --> 01:07:25,080
would go, so he's buried in Faulkner.

1097
01:07:25,349 --> 01:07:27,720
So we used to go and visit him.

1098
01:07:27,720 --> 01:07:29,199
I don't go anymore.

1099
01:07:30,380 --> 01:07:32,850
We used to go to the cemetery once a year.

1100
01:07:32,850 --> 01:07:37,079
I would take the kids and then we
would go to a restaurant in Sydney

1101
01:07:37,259 --> 01:07:39,339
Road and we would celebrate his life.

1102
01:07:40,285 --> 01:07:45,525
That was really important for the children
and it worked really well with my mum.

1103
01:07:45,995 --> 01:07:50,735
One of the things we did, and we
still get together now, because for my

1104
01:07:50,735 --> 01:07:53,184
sisters, I think it's more important.

1105
01:07:53,874 --> 01:07:58,450
But, well, they feel that necessity,
you know, because There's such an age

1106
01:07:58,470 --> 01:08:03,100
gap within, between all our children,
but when we first started after she

1107
01:08:03,130 --> 01:08:06,340
first passed, we would get butterflies.

1108
01:08:06,340 --> 01:08:10,460
You can buy butterflies and you can
release them, but we actually stopped

1109
01:08:10,470 --> 01:08:14,470
doing that because we found that where
they Was getting a bit cool because

1110
01:08:14,470 --> 01:08:18,670
she died in the May, so we would
meet at a park and we would do that.

1111
01:08:19,330 --> 01:08:22,889
And then, you know, there were
times we would let a balloon go,

1112
01:08:22,969 --> 01:08:25,650
but then you realize they were
very bad for the environment.

1113
01:08:25,690 --> 01:08:27,270
So we stopped doing that.

1114
01:08:27,750 --> 01:08:30,079
That was long, long time ago.

1115
01:08:30,120 --> 01:08:34,620
And then what we've been doing over
the last however many years now is we

1116
01:08:34,620 --> 01:08:40,050
get rose petals and we collect rose
petals and then we all get together.

1117
01:08:40,720 --> 01:08:45,710
And just to keep the memory alive,
it's like, you know, just say one

1118
01:08:45,750 --> 01:08:50,310
thing about, you know, Nanny that
you remember, or one thing that,

1119
01:08:50,610 --> 01:08:55,730
you know, cause not all the kids got
to, the grandchildren met her sadly.

1120
01:08:55,730 --> 01:09:00,299
So, you know, what is the memory that
you've been told of most, you know,

1121
01:09:00,299 --> 01:09:05,229
by a parent or hearing, you know,
hearing us chatting between friends.

1122
01:09:06,455 --> 01:09:09,775
So, there are so many things to do
to keep these memories alive and I

1123
01:09:09,805 --> 01:09:11,475
think it's really, really important.

1124
01:09:11,945 --> 01:09:16,525
Catherine: Emily, that is really beautiful
and really great advice for people who

1125
01:09:17,164 --> 01:09:19,255
may be going through a similar situation.

1126
01:09:19,795 --> 01:09:22,069
Thank you so much for being with us today.

1127
01:09:22,510 --> 01:09:23,780
Thank you for having me.

1128
01:09:23,780 --> 01:09:23,920
It's

1129
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Emily: just been amazing.

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I appreciate it.

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Catherine: We hope you enjoyed today's
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brought to you by Critical Info.

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